Let the bones you broke rejoice

"Let the bones you broke rejoice".
These words have never been more real to me then they have been the last few months but I confess that as God has been tearing me apart I've been doing everything but rejoicing. I see that I want to follow Christ but I want to follow him my way. I don't want to give up things that I really love (comfort, friends, status, reputation to name a few). I get myself mixed up with God because I really do think I know more and can make better decisions; even with my decision making hitting an all time low I still think that! Stupid, yes. Arrogant, definitely. Prideful, exactly.
My God is all-knowing, all-loving, almighty, merciful, Holy, wrathful and jealous to name a few qualities. The last two don't get talked about much because most people don't like those terms. God is all-loving, not all-tolerant...don't get it twisted. I'm starting to be so thankful for a God who will literally do ANYTHING to make me more like him, even if that means breaking every single part of me. I can't believe that he loves me and wants me that much...it blows my mind. I've been complaining when I should be rejoicing! This whole time God is making it so clear that he loves me but I've been blinded by selfishness.
Lord, you spend so much time on me, you provide for me and teach me and love me but I'm rarely truely thankful for it. I pray that you will keep getting me out of the way and I pray that you will keep breaking me down because I'm hopeless without you. I need you, and I want to live everyday knowing that I'm in desperate need of you! I'm so thankful that you are a jealous God and that you have promised to finish the work that you have started within me!